just went through a whirlpool of emotions last night. lets just say it was a very harrowing night with my other half and it left me heartbrokened, confused, angry, miserable and many more emotions. These are the times when i need my best friend the most to talk to and sadly she was back home in malaysia where calling her from here would be useless as well as expensive. but as much as you think of yourself as worthless or not loved, you must remember that at least one person cares about you and needs you. in addition to that, there's at least one person whose constantly thinking about you every second of the day- so dont call yourself worthless, nor say you're despicable and unlovable.
back the story; i spent my time thinking over everything with a heavy heart but it dawned to me that i couldnt be angry or unhappy with his decision. it wasnt that he chose this route, but he was left with no choice. this is one of those situations that even though you cant help but feel angry at the situation you're stuck in, but you have to take everything that comes your way. sure its unfair, sure its not meant to be, but think of it rationally, if you feel this way, what if you're in your partner's shoes and have to be the one who breaks the news? what if you had no choice and you were put in the position to break someone's heart along with your own? its not easy on both sides, so dont try choosing.
bottom line: life is unfair, but you have to take it as it goes and try to make the best out of EVERY situation. behind a rotten rusty box lays a chestful of gold. the process of opening it is horrid, but eventually you'll end up with the best things in life. =]
Yours;
cookie.